Those Jewish secrets

As a Jew, it is never, "don't ask, don't tell." It's more like, " I'll tell you, but don't you dare tell anyone else." I was sworn into the secret club from earliest childhood, and this secret swearing is not restricted to sexual preference. My mother swore me in again as a young woman when she told me that as a child, she had to sleep in her parents’ bed. She was witness to all their lovemaking.  But she didn't tell me how she felt. She just handed me the package and said, "But, sweetheart, whatever you do- don’t tell anyone."

So, when yet another friend calls to reveal dark secrets, I am not surprised.   I am holding on for dear life and now I am being led to the abyss. Oy vey. Whose house is this, I think I know- his house is in the village though. Where is Robert Frost when I need him? I love my friend and our friendship even more, so I prepare for a very long story. I am being held to strict confidence- I cannot tell anyone about this- because she has been told not to tell anyone- so, why is she telling me? Because this is the club we belong to.  But, I can’t hold onto secrets anymore. Those secrets are a way of not seeing. At least for the person revealing. If they hand it off to you, is it gone? I refuse to be locked  into the secret dance where there is no exit. And for someone like me, if there is no exit, I need a paper bag to start breathing into. Now, this story is about death. That’s all I will tell. But I can’t afford to fall into the hole the story promises to create- I am devoted to living. But it takes me to my own life. All my worries. Stop worrying. Start living. You know that Dale Carnegie wasn’t Jewish. If he were, he would have told you to get rid of your secrets and start making other people worry. That's the way to start living.